December 23rd, 2017

I had another dizzy spell again today. It was just after lunch, when I was letting Chelsea out for her lunch break. I almost tripped and fell into her, but caught myself by grabbing the desk. Chelsea helped me take a seat and wouldn't leave till I said okay. Which was kind of her, but then she went and told Hal. Not that I mean to keep anything from him, but the last time I'd had a dizzy spell at work Hal had to drive me home. Which was when they'd tried to dig the tree up. The last time I'd had a dizzy spell was at his place after the earthquake. So I understand that he's making those connections, but nothing like that happened today. Still, Hal came directly to me to make sure everything was okay, and then at dinner he was really worried about any news of things happening today.

There's no connection, which I don't expect there would be, but Hal's convinced there is. So while we didn't find anything today, he's convinced something might turn up that we'll learn about later. Never mind all the other dizzy spells I've had with no similar connection.

I'm skipping around a bit. After work was dinner of course, and Max was able to make it. We talked about their finals, both of them were feeling good for the most part though Max was worried she'd only barely pass her statistics class. Hal brought up my attack today and used it to ask if Max had ever made any connections with the weird stuff she'd always find. Max was like me though, mostly unconcerned. She said most of the stuff she had ever found was always stuff she enjoyed debunking, not things she believed to be real.

Hal didn't want to let it go, but eventually had to once both Max and I told him to knock it off. Max flat out told him that until we could find some solid connection, this was something that I'd lived with for years without finding any connections. We were both over it, it was time he got over it too.

When we were finally able to move on, I brought up the article about missing items not being turned in to lost and found at DIA. We all agreed it was strange, but there hadn't been any follow up and we didn't have much to go on, so it was shrugged off and set aside.

The interview with Melia though, they both found it interesting. Max brought up the security video from the DIA incident and we compared it to the paramedic, Ace, who Melia was interviewing. They did look similar, but the security video wasn't clear enough for us to comfortably say it was the same guy.

Max didn't have anything for us, she'd spent the last two weeks either studying for finals or helping Robert study.

Which left Hal, who had also spent a good deal of time studying. But he did realize something interesting and had done some checking this morning out of curiosity. He noticed that since the earthquake, there hadn't been any further reports of the howling winds up in the mountains. It was almost as if they'd been forgotten, which would be one thing. But if they were still happening, there would still be reports. They'd just get set aside in favor of the earthquake news. There wasn't even any reports. It was an interesting point, but like the lost and not found items at DIA, there wasn't much we could do about it.

So we spent the rest of the night mostly celebrating the end of their semester. I didn't want to be a downer, but I did mention that eating out every week was getting to be a bit expensive for me. Hal of course offered to cover me, but I declined saying it'd be nice if we could just do dinner ourselves for a change. Max also echo'd the expense and thought it'd be a great idea, and that it'd be a bit more private as well. But she'd be moving back in with her parents over the break.

So Hal offered his place. He's got a kitchen and a small living room we could talk in. His roommate was moving out now that the semester was over. But he might get another roommate and had no control over that. And once the next semester started he would get a roommate. So at least for now, that might work for us. We're not so worried about Hal having a roommate, but his roommate might not appreciate our company every Saturday night.

After Max left though, Hal mentioned that was another reason he was looking forward to getting a place of his own. He asked if I'd done any thinking about it, and I said that my biggest concern was my parents knowing I'd be moving in with my boyfriend. I know it's a much more common thing these days, but he doesn't understand my father. Mom would be all for it, but Dad, not so much. I told him I'd talk to them about it, just to test the waters. Since he still doesn't have a place, this is all hypothetical anyway.

Hal was happy with that answer, and I don't blame him. It would be nice to just stay with him at night rather than have to have him drive me home before it gets too late. I just worry about what happens if things between us go sour. I've watched Max get in and out of relationships, and some of her breakups were pretty bad. She's always been glad that she has her own place even when she spends all her time at theirs.

As much as I would like a place of my own, and moving in with Hal is tempting for that reason. Max's experiences make me worried about what I'd do if Hal and I were to break up. If I move in with him, where do I go? I think I need that answered before I'm ready to commit.

December 19th, 2017

It struck me just now, as I was writing today's date, that the year is almost over. I'm not sure why that thought occurred to me, or why now. But now I find myself thinking about how there's less than half a month left. We still have Christmas, and of course the solstice party on Thursday. Max and Candace and the boys all have plans to take me tubing during the winter break between Max and Hal's semesters. But then school starts back up, and New Years hits and wow, that's it.

Kinda makes today feel like it was fast, which is the only thing that does. It was a slow day. We were busy, for usual, still getting those who want to see Nephmesu. But the guests are starting to blur, asking the same questions, kids pretending to be mummies, and that blur makes these last few weeks all seem to have taken place just today. Am I the only one who ever feels like that? Can't be.

Max and Hal were still taking finals. Hal did stop in at the museum today, but he was busy and had texted me before hand that he wouldn't be able to stay. He did make sure to pass in sight of me so he could wave, but that was all I saw of him. He was getting his internship papers signed so he could turn them in for credit in between finals and didn't have time to stay.

It was nice seeing him, but my lunch felt that much more lonely today.

Anyway, after getting home I was able to do some laundry that got me ahead of chores tomorrow. I did pull out some outfits to see what I could throw together for the party. I have to say, Candace's selections are perfect. I'll have to thank her again next time I see her.

After dinner I had some time to myself again, so I did some more research. Current news is mostly focused on cleanup efforts from the earthquake. I-70 has one lane open heading west, both east lanes are open. But I guess there was some damage to the road that will take time to repair and only the one west lane will be available for the next month or so. A lot of that will depend on the weather, but so far it sounds like the high country has been dry this year. So projections are good.

With all the focus on the earthquake, it's like the tree has fallen off the radar. I actually had to go looking to see if there was anything new. The ravens seem to have relaxed their vigil though, people are allowed to approach and even move through the intersection without being attacked. Though they are attacking anyone that approaches the police barriers. The police themselves seem to have taken to enforcing the same limits, and amazingly the ravens seem to accept that. There's been no reports of the one raven with the silver strip on its chest.

With so little else to find, I went back to Melia's site only to find a recorded conversation between herself and a paramedic that looked familiar. It took me a while to place him, but I finally realized it was the same paramedic that had been at DIA and rescued Arlene Dryver. They didn't mention that during the interview though and I had to go look up news footage from the DIA incident to confirm. I might be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that's him.

Melia seemed to be asking, Ace was his name, what his fellow paramedics were doing differently after the riots. Both of them kept repeating that they hoped there would be no more such riots, but on the off chance there were they wanted to be prepared for it. Ace seemed mostly focused on the winter weather and how that might affect things going forward. He said most likely the cold weather would discourage any further rioting, even the demonstrations were pretty scarce. But if anything were to happen, the cold could provide it's own danger were someone to get hurt. So that's what they were currently preparing for, making sure they had heat packs, thick blankets, and even thermos with warm drinks just in case. At the very least Ace seemed happy that they were able to pass around warm coco to people and just keep attitudes light.

Melia stressed that she didn't support the rioting, and that while the demonstrations were welcome she hoped people would be smart and calm and not let emotions run high. She seemed to suggest that the rioting was being triggered by individuals not part of the demonstrations, just agitators who wanted to cause trouble. She cautioned people to listen and pay attention, to not get caught up in any provocation.

It was an interesting conversation, and relatively short. I've saved the address so I can show Max and Hal next time we are able to talk about it. I have to admit though that I'm more interested in the paramedic. I really want to confirm if this Ace is the same paramedic from DIA. Doubt I'll ever be able to though.

So, chores tomorrow. Candace and Sam seem very intent on remaining at home this week. I'm not sure why, but I don't want to pry too much. They are entitled to their privacy. So while I won't be getting ready to visit her as I normally would, I do still have the party on Thursday to get ready for.

December 17th, 2017

Sunday morning meeting, not unexpected. With the Holidays upon us, we discussed a seasonal get together for the employees. Of course not to take sides and alienate anyone who doesn't share any particular religion (Good!) we'll celebrate the Solstice itself, which falls on the 21st this year, Thursday evening. After work they've made reservations at The Lucky Strike, a nearby bowling alley. Everyone is encouraged to come, and we can each bring a friend or significant other.

Since Hal and I would be each others significant other, we discussed inviting friends. I thought of Candace considering she so rarely gets out, but I wasn't sure I'd also be able to invite Sam. And I didn't want to dictate to Hal who he should invite. Hal said it wasn't a bad idea though, and he said I should talk to Candace and just test the water and see. If she wants to go and Sam's okay with it, great. If he wants to be there, Hal can invite him. My other concern was of course Max. She's always been my plus one, so she might resent me inviting anyone else. Hal figured if he wasn't inviting Sam, he could then invite Max. And if Candace said no, then I could invite Max and he could invite his roommate or something.

So after work I called Candace and talked to her about it. Just let her know what was going on, which since it fell on Thursday made it easy to discuss plans for that day. Candace actually said she and Sam were planning on staying in those days. They'dve been happy to have me as usual, but they didn't want to go out. At first I thought it might be their monthly feast, but she said that would be tomorrow night. She didn't offer any explanation, just that they didn't want to go out, and that it was fine if I wanted to go to the party.

Seemed kind of odd, but she wasn't forthcoming so I didn't pry. It freed me up to ask Max, who when I called was quick to say yes. I guess she's already feeling the stress of finals week, and having some way to relax in the middle of the week was a welcome diversion. She said she only had one final left on Friday, and that it was late in the day so she could study in the morning. Or well, after lunch if was able to get blasted.

Which reminded me about Hal's finals. So I called him to let him know that his plus one was free to be used and took the chance to ask if the party would interfere with his finals. He said he'd have a final on Friday morning, but that he was confidant about the test and wasn't worried about studying the night before. I get the feeling he doesn't have anyone else to ask, he actually seemed disappointed that I didn't have someone for him to invite. I asked about his roommate, but Hal suggested that was a last resort sort of thing. The guy seems nice enough, I've only seen him in passing, but I guess that's the way it is for Hal anyway. Hard to invite someone you don't see very often, even if you do live with them.

Anyway, that's why I'm a bit late getting to this: all the talking. Well, that and watching the news. I hadn't mentioned it yesterday 'cause I had my own things going on, but the earthquake caused damages to I-70 and has been backing up traffic something godawful. Thankfully no one was seriously hurt due to the falling rocks, but there was one car that was trapped over night while emergency crews were trying to get to them. Traffic is being routed through the other passes, which aren't exactly designed for that volume. The delays are horrendous and people aren't happy, which isn't helped by not having anyone to blame. So drivers are taking their frustrations out on each other, and the state patrol is having a hell of a time staying on top of all the incidents. Hopefully things will calm down as people adjust to our new reality, and hopefully construction crews can clear the rubble and repair the interstate quickly.

Between I-70 and the repairs at DIA, tempers are going to flare badly this holiday season. I'm so glad we aren't going anywhere this year.

December 15th, 2017

Since it was Friday and Hal had successfully turned in all his projects, we decided to go out and celebrate after work. We were at the restaurant, finishing up our dessert when the earthquake hit. That was so scary, I don't think I've ever felt anything like that. At first I thought I might be having an attack, but when I realized everything around me was shaking and making noise I knew it couldn't be me. It didn't last for very long, but everyone in the restaurant was rattled pretty badly. I guess Denver does feel tremors every once in a while, but they're so rare and so light that people hardly notice them. Reports claim it was a four to a four and a half. I guess that's only a minor earthquake on the scale of things, I can't imagine living in the Bay Area and experiencing something like that every few months.

Either way, both Hal and I were rattled. We finished up our dessert and went to his place where we could turn on the news and see what we could find. I think Hal just about had a heart attack when he found out the epicenter was registered as being in Arapaho National Forest. The problem is, we're not finding any listing more specific than that. Hal was hoping to confirm that it was at or near Lake Evelyn, but every source we could check was frustratingly vague. Which is odd, since usually they can be amazingly specific in a very short time.

What also seems odd is how long the earthquake lasted. From what we've learned, they don't usually last more than a few moments, thirty seconds at most. This one seemed to keep shaking for about three minutes, and I can tell you that three minutes felt like an eternity. Despite being a minor quake, damages are being reported all across the city and authorities are pointing to the duration of the quake as the reason.

While we were researching all of this I did have a dizzy spell. It wasn't a big deal, I did warn Hal as I always warn someone, and then I basically fell down on his couch and stayed there for a bit. I don't think it would have been very notable, but happening an hour after the earthquake had both of us feeling paranoid. I can't imagine that the earthquake had anything to do with my attacks, but with everything that's been going on since August...

So Hal and I got to discussing that, and I told him about the feeling I've had since then. I don't think I've told anyone except my doctor and my parents. That I had had such a strong attack during the eclipse was kind of a major thing. And now today there was an earthquake and I'm having another attack. It's only two points of commonality, but Hal is certain that the earthquake had something to do with The Ohvao. Combined with him breaking the runestone back in August, he's thinking that somehow his actions might be influencing my attacks. He thinks that rather than there being a physiological connection, that maybe there's a magical connection. With The Ohvao coming down, magic would be returning to our world.

I don't know, I know there's been some pretty strange things going on, but magic? Either way, I did remind him that I was having my attacks for years before any of this happened. His response is that if my attacks are linked to magic, they might have been linked even across The Ohvao. I still think he's grasping at straws. I'm not convinced my attack today had anything to do with the earthquake, not the least of which because it happened an hour afterward. But I have to admit, I've thought many times that maybe my attack in August was somehow associated with the eclipse. And then after finding out about Hal cracking that runestone, and the fall of The Ohvao. That does seem to be a strong link, but really we don't have anything that definitely connects them. It could just be coincidence, and until we can rule that out, I don't think we can say that my attacks are certainly caused by anything. I've been working on this with my doctor now for years, I know how it goes. There were times that I had thought I'd found the connection, always to find it fail.

And even if my attacks are connected with magic in some unlikely way. How would we even go about determining that? Up until now, magic wasn't real. So now there's things going on that says it is real, but we still don't have any experience with it. Only Hal's story of his mentor using a piece of jewelry to light a stone on fire. I'm sorry Hal, but I'm skeptical.

I didn't shut down his conspiracy, I just shrugged and said I don't know. He was at least reasonable enough to agree, we don't know. So we curled up on the couch and talked about seeing the movie tomorrow. Hal and I were hoping to talk to Max about things, but we're unsure about her boyfriend being there. How much he knows, or what he knows. We'll hit an early show and then get dinner afterward. It was her boyfriend that drove her up into the mountains to hear the sound, and it was his window that got cracked. So they can at least tell us about that, and we can judge how much more to say afterward.